Wow, it’s been a minute since I’ve posted here, and I apologize for being neglectful. Things have been weird, and that might be the understatement of 2020.
Speaking of 2020, what a fucking dumpster fire!
Life as we have known it is different, and for how long, no one knows. I have been treading water trying not to lose my shit, and some days it works really well! Some days it doesn’t work worth a shit. I’ve found that when I hit my threshold, if I identify it and classify it as whether or not it’s important, then treat it as needed I’m a lot happier. If it’s something I HAVE to do, then I do it. If it’s something I don’t need to do, then I set it aside for when I have the mental fortitude to do it.
This has served me well.
I’m super thankful for a wonderful partner that understands me better than I do. She doesn’t push me, she doesn’t admonish me, and most of all she loves me unconditionally. Now, if I could do that to myself, I’d be in much better shape!
Why is it we’re so tough on ourselves? Have I actually discussed this before? We are tender, feeling beings. Why do we hate ourselves, or at least criticize ourselves so much worse than we would a stranger? I mean I know why I do, and it’s not something that everyone has to deal with, thank the unicorn. I’d say generally speaking that anyone who has any kind of pride in themselves is tough on themselves.
I think what my overall idea I wanted to pass on is: Things are really fucked up right now. If you haven’t been arrested or committed yet, you’re doing okay. Sometimes doing okay is the best you can do, and that’s okay! Some days you’ll do better, and some days you’ll do worse, but if you’re keeping your head above water, you’re doing it right! Don’t listen to the tiny voice in your head that tells you “You’re not okay!” and “You’re useless!” or even “Who do you think you are?!”
Those voices are assholes. You are amazing!